There is often denial in families about the emotional troubles of others in the family. This is particularly true when a mother is emotionally unstable and family members look the other way instead of stepping in and dealing with the issue. The problem with this kind of denial is that children are affected by a mother’s mood swings, alcohol use, rage, verbal put downs or neediness. The same woman that no one in the family can deal with is left in charge of the children. Often fathers have no idea what to do and avoid the situation by withdrawing and resigning themselves to a wife’s...

Is there such a thing as a slacker young adult? Yes there is and they may be part of your own family or even living with you. I have recently been asked by 2 mothers who have children in their 20s living at home, how to help launch these grown children. First of all, not every child who lives in a multi-generational household is a slacker. Some are busy as students or full-time employees and it may be that these young adults are living at home to save money for something important or avoid student debt. In these cases, the children pay some of the living expenses of the house and do chores...

What does it mean to have a difficult mother? All mothers go through difficult periods due to fatigue, stress and the demands of adult life and parenting. However a truly difficult mother is difficult all the time and presents a child with an unresolvable dilemma: you can either sacrifice yourself and have a relationship with me or be your true self and I will ridicule, disapprove of or reject you. The child’s dependency on the mother is then exploited and he/she will have difficulty trusting others and developing close relationships in adulthood. Some of the characterisitics of a difficult...

This is a particularly difficult time for teens whose families have been hit hard with the economic changes. Why especially hard for teens? This is a time when teens want to break away from their families more and turn to the peer group. Yet if the family is in crisis, it becomes very hard to break away just when everyone needs to pull together. So the changes work against the developmental task of the teen years. It is also possible that being with the peer group would involve money that is no longer available .To go out to eat or on field trips or other youth activities requires money that...

If you are one of the many Americans currently facing a downward turn in your lifestyle, you may be concerned about the impact on your children. Whether the changes are due to the high costs of living, a job or business loss or an unsustainable mortgage, your life and therefore your children’s lives will be changing. Recent research in the field of behavioral economics tells us that losses are twice as painful as gains are pleasurable. Learning how to cope with loss is a major life skill and challenge and your children will be watching to see how you handle it. This is how they will learn...

It is important to be able to talk openly with your children about money and the money in the family. Sometimes the only time children hear the word is in the context of conflict, as when parents are arguing or they are being denied a treat. Having open talks begins to break the money taboo and teaches them that this an acceptable subject for a conversation, not just for an argument.

The concepts important to teach include how to spend wisely, how to save, how to invest and to accept that there are others in the world who have a different amount of money, both more and less than they...

In this article I use the term “women” to discuss the part of our population that was socialized with traditional feminine middle-class values. However this information may apply to men who were raised in this manner and may not apply to women who were raised in other cultures or with non-traditional socialization. So let me say at the outset that I realize I am making generalizations that do not apply across the board and may not apply to many women…..but you may be in relationship with someone who was raised in these traditions and that may be of use to you.

I will...